My Soliloquyz

Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind

2008-08-16T08:02:00.000-07:00

How happy is the blameless vestal's lot!
The world forgetting, by the world forgot
Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind!
Each prayer accepted, and each wish resigned.

- Alexander Pope

The Platform

2008-04-30T11:41:00.000-07:00

Some thoughts which i penned down 3 years ago.....

Standing here alone on this vacant platform...
I feel like a flying bird;
Even the acute pain does not move my mind.....
The smoke from my cigarette swirls up
in a complex geometric pattern.....
Only to be lost in the distant scorching sky.

For twenty-two years I have seen that burning sky.....
My life - an express train.....
Speeding on the wrong tracks of life
towards an unknown destination.....
Lots of pain buried alive in my heart,
And with a brush drenched in this pain
Are painted the hollow and false dreams
On a canvas called the Future.

I am still alone today,
Waiting for life's miracles.....
The distant galaxies mock at me.....
May be somebody out there is searching for me....my dad.....

Your cascading black hair, those dreamy eyes
Have long been lost in this galaxy of mine.
While you will one day become lost in someone else's heart,
Who will love you more than I can.....

Feeling very sad for this blue shirt,
Dad used to wear it.....
Dad used to dream..... may be
He couldn't resist the temptation
To feel the burning sky close to his heart.
Coming back to life.....Thinking of my next life,
May be the scorching sky will become blue.....
May be this green earth will give birth
to a burning ember.....
May be a failed youth will take refuge
in a cloud of cigarette smoke.....
My cigarette is coming to an end,
Just like the days with my dad.....

I can see your eyes in the distance like a mirage.....
You are not mine today, you were never mine.....
Still, in my life's desert,
You are a drop of fresh water, a mirage.....

For twenty-two years I have dreamed.....
And have seen them fade away one by one,
Still am happy.....
Somewhere on this earth,
That burnt out cigarette knows me, understands me.....
.....My train has come.....Adieu!

The winding road leads back home.....

2008-02-21T07:17:00.000-08:00

Its ages since i have blogged. I dont even remember where the days, months and years have flown past.....So much to tell you guys.....where do I start? Lemme think.

Ya, the MBA life of course. Strategy, competitor analysis, break-even point, blah blah. And at the end of it all, a degree which brands you with awe and dignity; a MBA grad, a pedigree of its own. Well who would deny the limelight?

Life has taken its course over the last 2 years. I remember the day I quit my job. It was raining heavily. And rains in Bangalore are awful.... Life has given me everything that I wanted but it has cost me a lot too. But no regrets. Chasing the ever eluding "Success", defined in my own terms as the mental satisfaction achieved during the course of action of completing a job at hand, whose completion not only creates a sense of ecstasy but creates a vacuum which sucks the very existence of happiness. The road has just began and i know not what lies beyond the bend. But who cares.

Friends for ever....

2007-08-26T13:36:00.000-07:00

Take a guess where this picture is taken. Well shorts, capris,dark glasses and a visible tan isnt that enough hint....You got it!! Goa....and these are my very very close friends. To the extreme left is May, working in London. My friend, philosopher and guide. She is a sweet girl with immense confidence to even make you believe that stars shine in the day. Next to him is Deepak, our rock guitarist and presently working in London with May. He has some amazing hits under his belt. The girl in yellow shirt is Sakku, our confused darling. She is a real swetheart.She is all married now and settled. Kavi, the red nosed beautiful lady is in the centre who has an amazing appetite for pani puris. She has left for US for her studies . To her right is our sweet Deepu, the Accenture Business Analyst and a great talker. Caring and sharing are her personality traits. The guy in shorts is Ashu, working in US and presently running behind all the luxuries in the world which definitely includes those blondes. He is a very caring guy who will make sure that evrybody is comfortable. The guy sitting down is our Mannu, silent and intelligent. But its jus the tip of the iceberg. Deep inside he is a very friendly and caring person. Even he has left for US with Kavi. The girl to his right is Mann. what do i tell about her. Well let me quote a line from the testimonial i sent her and which was rejected cos of technical reasons(jus kidding). She is so unpredictable that she's almost an enigma.And her dimpled smile is a spectacle.All in all she is one hell of a true friend i could have ever asked for.

And to imagine that 3 years back we were all together in Goa with the no clue whats on the cards. We still cant gaze into the crystal ball and say when we will all meet but i defintely dream of the day when we shall all meet in Goa and this time its gonna be one hell of a crazy party.....Miss all u guys. Did i miss somebody..well thats me....

I am my inner soul.....(Remember Fight Club)

2007-08-26T13:31:00.000-07:00

For those of you who have stumbled onto this space by mistake and would like to spare a few of your precious moments with me…let me take this opportunity to introduce myself. I am the next door guy and I love to chill out with friends and party.

Now my passions…
Zarbara…I know she will be one of the first persons reading this.
My passion for movies has been reinforced by two very good friends of mine, Shashank and Nebu. And the all night directorial discussions of Steven Spielberg, David Fincher, Terrence Malik, and our own Ramu (Ram Gopal Varma) used to bring nightmares in Sandeep’s eyes.
(He finally left the hostel because of us).
Poetry...just like to pen down a couple of lines, that’s all.

Enough ramblings about me. You will come to know me better (though I don’t have any such intentions) through my subsequent posts.